Perception Books - Page 10

The Tangled Wing: Biological Constraints on the Human Spirit

Melvin Konner

List Price: $19.45 By: Holt, Rinehart, and Winston Amazon Marketplace: 107 new & used starting at $0.01

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 11 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

First published twenty years ago to great acclaim, The Tangled Wing soon became a must-read for anyone interested in the biological roots of human behavior and emotions. Since then however, revolutions have taken place in the biological sciences--not only in genetics but molecular biology and neuroscience as well. All of these innovations have been brought into account in this vastly expanded edition of a book originally called an "overwhelming achievement" by the Times Literary Supplement.

In a masterful synthesis of biology, psychology, anthropology, and philosophy, Konner delves unabashedly into the seat of human emotions. He shows what is "natural" and what is merely construct. His discussion and analysis are both sensitive and straightforward, ranging from such compelling topics as brain differences between the sexes to the roots of mental illness. Finally, in a stirring tribute to the human spirit, he demonstrates how our tremendous capacity for change illuminates our prospects for the future.


Notes and References
Complete notes and references for The Tangled Wing are available online in either PDF or HTML format, at www.henryholt.com/tangledwing

The Pathways to Peace Anger Management Workbook

William Fleeman

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 1 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

In 1998, William Fleeman founded the highly successful Pathways to Peace to provide violence prevention tools, skills, and programs that inspire individuals and communities to live together in harmony. This book shows that this program can transform anyone with an anger management problem. The author's experience is that people with anger problems use anger like a drug, to change feelings of powerlessness into feelings of power. This book helps people unlearn this destructive pattern through a cognitive/behavioral approach. Included are 18 anger management sessions with personal stories and questions. The sessions can be completed in 18 to 20 weeks or less. Chapters cover self-assessment, the eight steps to recovery, what to avoid, special methods and skills, life mission and spirituality, goals, forgiveness, and more - all geared to keeping anger under control. This is the official text for the acclaimed self-help anger management program used in schools, prisons, and drug/alcohol treatment centers today.

Dreams of Love and Fateful Encounters: The Power of Romantic Passion

Ethel S. Person

List Price: $16.00 By: Penguin (Non-Classics) Amazon Marketplace: 51 new & used starting at $0.01

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 9 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

Impressive, wise, deep, rewarding book 5 out of 5 stars.
11 of 11 people found this review helpful.

I am so surprised to see the two reviews that are critical of this book. I would give this amazing book 6 stars if it were possible. I have been unable to put it down -- it's like a life-changing gift to my mind -- because of its highly intelligent, thourough writing, and the depth with which the author approaches the subject of love, and humanity in general.

This engaging book validates the importance of romantic love, whether lasting or fleeting, and discusses the fascinating intricacies involved in feelings that accompany love as it begins, evolves and ends -- and it does it with a mixture of warmth and wisdom, like no other book I have ever read (and I read a lot on this subject).

The writing is clear and well organized -- you know immediately that the author is a brilliant, highly cultured person -- not some shallow pop icon/TV personality, or a mediocre therpaist who has no knowledge of other disciplines. I would've loved to be Person's student.

She shares her vast knowledge with us in a way that leaves us much richer than before. Her examples of various love stories are not boring at all (as one of the reviewers stated) -- they are drawn from high class literature and films, and from the history of human civilization -- they are timeless.

With all due respect, I think that the readers who did not appreciate this book must have very short attention spans and could not lift themselves to the level of this book.

Editorial Review:

Well-known psychoanalyst Dr. Ethel S. Person draws on examples from Auden and Shakespeare, from the movies of Humphrey Bogart and the novels of Judith Krantz, and from her own high school experiences in Kentucky to describe the nature of love and its fitful occurrence.

Shyness: What it is What to Do About it (Addison-Wesley Series in Mechanics and Thermodynamics)

Philip G. Zimbardo

List Price: $5.95 By: Addison-Wesley Educational Publishers Inc Amazon Marketplace: 30 new & used starting at $0.50

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 13 Average rating: 3.0 of 5

Outdated but still the best 4 out of 5 stars.
17 of 18 people found this review helpful.

Being a true-blue shy person, I've ordered every book on shyness I could find. This author seems to be the only one who really knows what he's talking about. The reason I give it 4 stars instead of 5 is that it's outdated. The only thing that has changed since I bought this book 10 years ago is it's cover.

Of course it's dated. All classics are. It is nevertheless timeless. 4 out of 5 stars.
11 of 13 people found this review helpful.

Zimbardo opens his book by stating that shyness is "a universal experience" (page 14, paperback 6th ed. 1978), that nearly 80% of those polled said they had been shy at some point in their lives, half of whom had overcome it. He establishing a range of shyness from, on one end of the range a tendency toward introversion, to mid-range shyness of situational awkwardness and feeling intimidated, to the really shy people who dread public speaking, etc. and finally the far end of shyness that "may become a severe form of neurosis." Zimbardo briefly discusses the 20% of shy people who like being shy, revealing what advantages it can have for people. Zimbardo seeks not to promote a rigid and narrow, academically approved "type" of personality, much less equate shyness with a tendency toward crime, as one reviewer claimed. At most Zimbardo implies that among those who are convicted criminals, there was a greater number who were isolated socially. Well.... Duh... One reviewer mischaracterizes Zimbardo's book by choosing to see this (rather self-evident) point as meaning that shy people have a propensity toward crime. What Zimbardo actually says that shyness in the extreme, can be a contributing factor to the degradation of one's mental health, which, if unchecked, can in some cases continue to deeper pathologies. And at that level of pathology, should there be no means of healthy release of the internal stresses and tensions of such pathology, in some cases can lead to violence against self or another person. There are a lot of contingencies that one reviewer chose to ignore, resulting in a logic by which getting out of bed in the morning, an act that all killers do, indicates a propensity to murder. Let's not misread Zimbardo, whose "...main interest is only in helping shy people remove barriers to their greater freedom, to their fuller participation in life, and to their personal sense of worth and mastery" (120).

Editorial Review:

Judging by the number of copies already sold (more than 300,000), scores of people suffer from the debilitating effects of shyness. A noted professor of psychology at Stanford University, Dr. Philip G. Zimbardo helps men and women, youngsters and oldsters, overcome this self-defeating condition. Photographs. Reissue.

To Love and Be Loved

Sam Keen

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 3 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

To Love and Be Loved is a spirited challenge to a culture obsessed with romance and intimacy but dangerously ignorant of the full range of human love. Like a fresh wind, Sam Keen sweeps away tired self-help nostrums and reams of "bad advice from Dr. Lonelyhearts" to reveal a stunningly new map of love in all its forms.



Love is not something we "fall" into, claims Keen, but a complex art combining many skills and talents that take a lifetime to learn fully. At the center of his book are sixteen distinct "elements of love": ranging from attention--a precious gift we can bestow on co-worker, friend, child, and spouse alike--to more exclusive gifts like desire and sexuality. Combining stories, poems and quotes with insights from modern psychology and spiritual tradition, Keen brilliantly explores the elements of memory and solitude in love, the importance of both enjoyment and commitment, and how we can cultivate the essential qualities of empathy and compassion. Each piece ends with suggestions for strengthening our daily practice of the element, so that we constantly enlarge our ability to love in all our relationships.



The final section of the book is a soaring meditation on the claim that "those who love know God," an invitation to experience our place in the universe through the eyes of love.

I'm Scared (Dealing With Feelings)

Elizabeth Crary

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 4 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Wonderful! 5 out of 5 stars.
12 of 19 people found this review helpful.

Great with a mixed-age group of kids in church-school. The kids eagerly answered the questions, and it had something for the 3 year olds and the 12 year olds.

I'm Scared 5 out of 5 stars.
0 of 0 people found this review helpful.

I have a grandson who is nearly 5 years old. I feel this series of books assist young children in understanding that their emotion has a name, is felt by lots of people and gives them choices in what to do with their feelings. It also gives the parent or caregiver the opportunity to talk with the child and provide love and support when he/she is feeling an emotion strongly.

Editorial Review:

Too often kids’ feelings get ignored. "I'm Scared" is part of the "Dealing with Feelings" series that helps children and adults accept and acknowledge their emotions. It also helps them distinguish between feelings and actions. Even more important, the stories give kids several ways to cope with feelings by utilizing the "choose-your-own-ending" format. They also allow parents and teachers to discuss other situations in a nonjudgmental way.

This story describes a girl who is anxious to meet the new kids next door...but frightened by their big dog. Young readers and their parents can help her decide how to handle her fear.

Shame and Pride: Affect, Sex, and the Birth of the Self

Donald L. Nathanson

List Price: $24.95 By: W W Norton & Co Inc Amazon Marketplace: 34 new & used starting at $1.35

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Total reviews: 5 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Shame -- Now I understand! 5 out of 5 stars.
16 of 21 people found this review helpful.

Shame and Pride: Affect, Sex, and the Birth of the Self

This is the most readable and cogent explanation of shame to those of us born and bred with that heritage, not knowing it was not the norm for sense of self and relationships. Excellent! I read it in 1992 and am rereading it and sharing it with those who live with the taint of shame.

Don't miss this incredible book! 5 out of 5 stars.
14 of 16 people found this review helpful.

The Editorial Review by the Library Journal has it totally wrong! Affect Psychology, as presented in this easy to read book, will open your mind to a new way of thinking about human emotions. The hardest emotion for the reader will be shame, and as shame is described it may interrupt your interest and excitement as you read. Press on! Once you really understand what he has to say, you will never again view your own or others emotions in the same way. This book's concepts are accessible, useable, and extremely applicable in today's crazy world.

Editorial Review:

Probing the depths of emotional response, the author identifies nine emotional triggers that not only determine how we feel, but also shape our sense of self.

The Luscher Color Test

Dr. Max Luscher

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Total reviews: 17 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Easiest of the deep psychological tests to self administer 5 out of 5 stars.
9 of 9 people found this review helpful.

I have no clear idea of exactly why the Luscher color test works, I simply know that, in my own case, it proved incredibly accurate. It is amazing that a simple selection sequence of eight colored cards could reveal so much about internal anxieties, compensations, and conflicts. Yet, there definately is a correlation with these inner states and color preference.

This is probably the easiest of the deep psychological tests to administer and interpret. It is not a game and is not to be used carelessly or improperly. In fact, I first heard about it in graduate school when I overheard one of the psychology professors go ballistic when he found that the undergraduates were administering the test to each other. He wasn't upset because he thought it was nonsense, on the contrary, he was upset because he knew it to be a deep and powerful tool with the potential to do great damage if misused.

One further warning, if you buy an older edition of this book make sure that: #1 the eight cards are included, and #2 that they are not too badly faded.

Oh yes, the text states that this test is still accurate even if you are color blind!

Love (Penguin Classics)

Stendhal, B. C. J. G Knight

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Total reviews: 6 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

The first 'Pale Fire'. 4 out of 5 stars.
19 of 21 people found this review helpful.

There are some readers, the editors of this volume for instance, who would like to reduce this astonishing book to an expression of Stendhal's love for an untouchable woman. Anyone willing to look a little beyond armchair psychology will find a work that is possibly the first 'Pale Fire'. On the surface the work is a philosophical and scientific discourse on the nature of love, and as such it has so much truth and insight that I urge you to give it to your loved one so that he/she might understand you a little better. But this treatise is a translation from the inchoate notes left by an Italian suicide, Lisio Visconti. It is full of anecdotes, stories, digressions, contradictions, repetitions, ellipses, declamations. The writer's objectivity, Kinbote-like, is continually undermined by his obvious madness, his reminiscences of a failed love affair, and that of a friend, Salviati, who may also be Visconti. This textual instability is a constant, playful joy, and perfectly mirrors the difficulties of the book's subject.

Editorial Review:

In 1818, when he was in his mid-thirties, Stendhal met and fell passionately in love with the beautiful Mathilde Dembowski. She, however, was quick to make it clear that she did not return his affections, and in his despair he turned to the written word to exorcise his love and explain his feelings. The result is an intensely personal dissection of the process of falling - and being - in love: a unique blend of poetry, anecdote, philosophy, psychology and social observation. Bringing together the conflicting sides of his nature, the deeply emotional and the coolly analytical, Stendhal created a work that is both acutely personal and universally applicable.

Born for Love: Reflections on Loving

Leo F. Buscaglia

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Total reviews: 7 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Love - Start With Yourself 5 out of 5 stars.
5 of 5 people found this review helpful.

This is a very beautiful book; and very easy to read. Each page is like a short story that defines love, and makes the reader drunk with joy, if you will.

One of my favorite messages in this book reads, "Even when no one else seems to recognize how truly remarkable we are, we always have ourselves, the one inexhaustible resource for positive reinforcement, the one person who will always proudly wave our personal flag."

This is a wonderful message to use as an affirmation, because as one says these words, out loud, with closed eyes, 3 times per day, for 21 days (enough time to form new habits), you see, feel and hear more of your connection to the human race.

And it is in this new place, one is able to transcend the self and focus upon the needs of others around us, while we fulfill our own needs.

It is also the best way to follow the path that you are here to travel.

Editorial Review:

The man who first brought love to the classroom offers a postgraduate course for people in every kind of relationship and for those who yearn for love. In powerful short takes, Leo Buscaglia turns the light of his wisdom on every facet of the priceless jewel of love and discusses: Love that is more than a comfort zone; Creating an "Us" without destroying the "Me;" The value of differences, and so much more. These challenging lessons in loving will enrich your life for as long as you live.