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Red Hot Mamas

Colette Dowling

Red Hot Mamas Colette Dowling List Price: $23.95
By: Bantam
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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 3 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

It's a Wonderful Life 4 out of 5 stars.
22 of 23 people found this review helpful.

I admit it's been a while since I read this book. On the other hand, I found it so pivotal I have given it to friends and gone out to buy more copies, one of which I am starting to reread now. This book is funny and it is sad. Most of all, I found it realistic and affirmative.

I am a relatively conservative person, so I found some parts of the book a little over-the-top, but the underlying affirmative message is one we shouldn't ignore. I encountered the book just as I was dipping my toes into graduate school at the age of 50+. I had lived a fulfilling life as stay-at-home wife and mother and had run my own home-based business for years. I never intended to go back to school, but it seemed like the right thing to do at the time and with my husband's blessings and my children's encouragement, off I went in a totally new direction. Somehow I felt this book gave me permission to go for it.

Red Hot Mammas is about attitude as much as anything else. I loved its feisty attitude and I took that into the classroom where I discovered that not only could I hold my own, but that I had greater perspective than so many younger students. And the best part was that I wasn't crippled by their social and future-oriented worries. I already had a husband, children, fulfilling work. I was there not to get a mate or a job or a "future", but because I genuinely wanted to learn. I was doing what I WANTED.

To make a long story short, I lost my husband tragically during my two years in grad school. I have since gone on to a high tech consultancy job (about as far removed from my former life as you can imagine). I now live alone, with complete freedom, fully invested in my two somewhat grown children as well as my career and completely happy with everything except the loss of my husband.

My younger sister visited me last weekend, suffering burnout from family and work responsibilities. My message to her was, "Relax - we can do anything anything we want." That's Colleen Dowling's message really. It's very empowering. Check it out. And don't forget your sense of humor.

Editorial Review:

The stories of dozens of middle-aged women addresses such topics as redefined family responsibilities, career changes, menopause, intimate relationships, face-lifts, and remarriage.

My Time: Making the Most of the Rest of Your Life

Abigail Trafford

My Time: Making the Most of the Rest of Your Life Abigail Trafford List Price: $25.00
By: Basic Books
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Total reviews: 9 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

Kids grown? Mortgage paid? Career topping out? What now? In My Time, best-selling author Abigail Trafford answers the questions more and more 50somethings are asking themselves.Thanks to the longevity revolution of recent decades, today's 55-75-year-olds are living and working longer and healthier than ever before. This generation is the first to experience the period of personal renaissance in between middle and old age--what Trafford calls "My Time." Defining this period as a whole new developmental stage in the life cycle, Trafford skillfully guides readers through the obstacles of "My Time" and offers them the opportunity to take full advantage of the bonus decades.With the same wit, compassion, and vivid storytelling that made Crazy Time one of the best-loved books ever written on the subject of divorce, Trafford blends personal stories with expert opinions and the latest research on adult development. From the doctor who gave up his practice to write books to the widowed mother of three who reinvented herself as a successful photographer, true tales of crisis and triumph sparkle on every page of this inspiring and insightful book.Like Gail Sheehy's Passages, My Time is certain to profoundly affect the journey through our adult years.

How to Prepare for Your High School Reunion and Other Midlife Musings

Susan Allen Toth

How to Prepare for Your High School Reunion and Other Midlife Musings Susan Allen Toth List Price: $16.95
By: Little Brown & Co (T)
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Total reviews: 1 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

It helped me laugh about my upcoming reunion 4 out of 5 stars.
2 of 2 people found this review helpful.

10 years ago I spotted this book while approaching my twentieth reunion. I fell in love with the title essay and am now ordering it for a friend as we approach yet another reunion. This is not a how to book. It is a collection of musings on life, and a very enjoyable one.

A Generation of Seekers: The Spiritual Journeys of the Baby Boom Generation

Wade Clark Roof

A Generation of Seekers: The Spiritual Journeys of the Baby Boom Generation Wade Clark Roof List Price: $20.00
By: Harpercollins
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Total reviews: 2 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Inside and Out, Boomers are Spiritual Seekers 4 out of 5 stars.
12 of 12 people found this review helpful.

One in every four of them say they can imagine God as a Mother. One in three are born-again Christians. Two in three support the ordination of women. Who are they? Whether you think of them as the Love Generation, the Now Generation, the Pepsi Generation, the Rock Generation, or the Me Generation, they are the "boomers," the baby boom generation of 76 million Americans born between 1946 and 1964.

Many people have speculated about the boomers' beliefs and higher values (or lack of same). Now the details of their spiritual worldview has received substantial factual representation in the new book A Generation of Seekers: The Spiritual Journeys of the Baby Boom Generation (Harper San Francisco). It's a massive study that tells us all we ever wanted to know about the spiritual lives of baby boomers but didn't have the means to find out. The research, involving surveys as well as in depth interviewing, was funded by the Lilly Foundation. The director of the research and author of the book reporting the results, is Wade Clark Roof, who is J. F. Rowny Professor of Religion and Society at the University of California, Santa Barbara.

Roof compiled 80 questions to ask of a stratified sample of 1600 boomers, plus some comparative groups of older Americans. Among the questions: Do you feel God is personally involved in your life? Do you believe God is "within us"? How much do you think about why there is suffering in the world? What happens after death? Is it good to explore many different religious teachings and learn from them, or should one stick to a particular faith? The researchers followed up this survey with an in-depth telephone interview conducted with one third of the respondents. Then they conducted face-to-face interviews with 64 of these people. There followed several group meetings with respondents to discuss in still more depth some of the spiritual or religious issues that emerged in the earlier interviews. Clearly, the study was thorough.

The book contains so many interesting charts and statistics, it is easy to graze among the facts. When asked, for example, "For you, which is more important: to be alone and to meditate, or to worship with others?" 53 per cent preferred to be alone, and 29 per cent preferred to worship with others. 28 per cent indicated a belief in reincarnation and 26 a belief in astrology. These two figures were constant, regardless of level of education. In the older generation, belief in these two controversial areas existed mainly in the less educated. Sixty per cent prefer to explore a variety of religious teachings, while 28 per cent feel it is important to stick to one faith. The greater the amount of education, the greater is the desire for variety in religious exploration. There may be a pattern here.

Roof puts the facts together to present a picture with many complex patterns, and offers some startling conclusions. For starters, the boomers are spiritual seekers. Almost without exception they believe in God. Although they picture God in different ways (and many are struggling to find an image they can accept), they all seem to have an instinct for spiritual commitment, something that will take them beyond themselves. They have, however, an apparent deep division in their ranks.

Roof describes as a "spiritual divide" the split between those boomers who are of a fundamentalist Christian orientation and those who pursue less conventional spiritual paths, from Native American spirituality to Zen Buddhism. He finds several points of divergence in these two groups: the self orientation of the less conventional vs. the Jesus orientation of the fundamentalists, inner authority vs. outer authority, individualism vs. uniformity, mystical vs. theistic, letting go vs. mastery and control, spiritual vs. religious, and being influenced by the "sixties" vs. "sheltered" from that influence. Billy Graham, of an older generation, and speaking from one side of the issue, summed up the essence of the difference when he said, "The locus of the conflict in the world today rises from the battle between the absolute and the relative." The boomers are split over whether the spirit is sought within oneself, where in might appear in many guises, or in outside authority, where it would appear in a more uniform fashion.

The tension between unity and diversity is archetypal. The One and the Many: one God, the Creator, yet many Creatures, all of whom experience a certain autonomy. This tension is at the heart of our country: E Pluribus Unum, out of the many, one. It's dangerous to allow either faction to gain the upper hand. If individualism were to win the day, there's the danger of chaos. If the forces of uniformity and control were to become dominant, there's the danger of a dictatorial, soul-murdering society. It's hopefully possible and definitely fruitful to hold the two factions in creative tension.

Roof himself suggests a possible tension bridge over the spiritual divide within the boomers. For one thing, he found ample evidence that the fundamentalism of the boomers is quite to the left of earlier generations. There are many concessions to individualism, most notably the premise that having a better life is the prime motive for being a good Christian. He concludes that the self-improvement ethic, regardless of the images or vocabulary used, unites all boomers. Self-realization, whether focused through an external ideal, or inwardly through the prompting of one's own heart, would seem to be the boomer's common search. Roof also found that as that search matures toward self-fulfillment, boomers are uniformly committed to sharing the fruits with others. As self-fulfilled becomes self-transcended, boomers become

Editorial Review:

A study of the baby boom generation's search for meaning and values presents portraits that reveal the soul of the new generation of leaders in politics, business, and education. $25,000 ad/promo.

Handbook of Midlife Development (Wiley Series in Adulthood and Aging)

Margie E. Lachman

Handbook of Midlife Development (Wiley Series in Adulthood and Aging) Margie E. Lachman Amazon Price: $126.00
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By: Wiley
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Editorial Review:

THE DEFINITIVE RESOURCE ON MIDLIFE DEVELOPMENT

Edited by Margie Lachman, a leader in the field, Handbook of Midlife Development provides an up-to-date portrayal of human development during the middle years of the life span. Featuring contributions from well-established, highly regarded experts, this exhaustive reference fills the gap for a compilation of research on this increasingly important topic.

Divided into four comprehensive sections, the book addresses the theoretical, biomedical, psychological, and social aspects of midlife development. Each chapter includes coverage of unifying themes such as gender differences, ethnic and cultural diversity, historical changes, and socioeconomic differences from a life-span developmental perspective. Readers will discover what can be learned from individuals' subjective conceptions of midlife; explore various "cultural" fictions of middle age; examine the resources individuals have at their disposal to negotiate midlife; consider mechanisms for balancing work and family; and other topics as presented in the latest research from the social, behavioral, and medical sciences.

Handbook of Midlife Development is an indispensable resource for professionals and practitioners who work with adults and for researchers and students who study adult development and related topics.

Some of the midlife topics discussed:
* Cultural perspectives
* Physical changes
* Stress, coping, and health
* Intellectual functioning
* Memory
* Personality and the self
* Adaptation and resilience
* Emotional development
* Families and intergenerational relationships
* Social relationships
* The role of work
* Planning for retirement

America the Wise: Longevity, Revolution and the True Wealth of Nations

Theodore Roszak

America the Wise: Longevity, Revolution and the True Wealth of Nations Theodore Roszak List Price: $25.00
By: Houghton Mifflin
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Total reviews: 2 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

Theodore Roszak, the author of the international bestseller THE MAKING OF A COUNTER CULTURE, returns to investigate the baby boom generation as it prepares to join the ranks of our society's rapidly growing senior population. America the Wise will ignite a nationwide debate that promises to transform our most fundamental ethical and cultural values as well as our economic and political priorities. Roszak argues that the emergence of senior dominance (in numbers, wealth, and political power) will force Americans to rethink their basic attitudes toward death and dying, competition and compassion, wealth and well-being. He mounts a compelling defense of senior entitlements and envisions a society in which the ability to prolong productive and fulfilling lives is regarded as a paramount historic achievement rather than an inconvenient fiscal problem. AMERICA THE WISE provides an insightful look at the changes that await America in every walk of life, from the mass media and business to family life, from our obsession with the cult of youth and consumer culture to sexual and gender relations. Roszak calls upon the newly emerging ranks of our senior population to establish a society based not on the survival of the fittest but on wisdom, compassion, and the survival of the gentlest.

Adult Development and Aging, 2nd Edition

Marion Perlmutter, Elizabeth Hall

Adult Development and Aging, 2nd Edition Marion Perlmutter, Elizabeth Hall List Price: $99.40
By: Wiley
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Editorial Review:

Takes a life-span view of development and a multi-disciplinary approach to adulthood, presenting development and aging at multiple levels: biological, psychological, sociological, anthropological, cultural and historical. Stresses the plasticity and diversity of aging. Promotes an understanding of adult development and of life in an aging society. Intended to develop analytic skills in students by allowing them to interpret age differences.

Going Home Grown Up: A Relationship Handbook for Family Visits

Anne F. Grizzle

Going Home Grown Up: A Relationship Handbook for Family Visits Anne F. Grizzle List Price: $10.99
By: Harold Shaw Publishers
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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 1 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Highly recommend! You will want others to have it! 5 out of 5 stars.
7 of 8 people found this review helpful.

Fix a cup of tea and curl up in your favorite chair for wonderful reading. I can not imagine that anyone would not find this book to be of value. It will change your whole outlook on your adult family relationships. It is especially appropriate for this time of year and the preparation for holiday visits. Yet, the book has sound advice and practical suggestions that we can use at any time.

It is easy to read with beautiful illistrations and examples. Most of all, it includes thought provoking questions that encourages each of us to consider the messages in the book in the context of our individual family situations.

This will be a book that you want to give to others. And one I would want my own children to have when they become adults.

The Black Swan: Memory, Midlife, and Migration

Anne Batterson

The Black Swan: Memory, Midlife, and Migration Anne Batterson List Price: $23.00
By: Scribner
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Total reviews: 4 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

Set against a spontaneous cross-country road trip following the migrating birds, this passionate, lyrical memoir is one woman's reflections on midlife, her important personal relationships, her kaleidoscopic past, and her uncertain future.

To fifty-six-year-old Anne Batterson, a woman whose life has been filled with adventure -- as a commercial pilot, an international skydiving champion, a trekking guide in Nepal -- her husband's decision to retire felt like a death sentence. Yearning for some way to reconcile herself to the future that was rapidly unfolding before her, she packed up her VW camper and hit the road with maps, bird guides, and little else except the desire to follow the fall migration and the bone-deep hunch that birds had something important to teach her.

In this beautifully written narrative of that extraordinary trip, Batterson writes movingly not only about her experiences with the birds but also about the people she loves, has lost, and connects with along the way. Events from the present trigger vivid stories from the past. In the chapter "The Journey Within the Journey," a long, lonely night in a deserted campground in Virginia conjures up the ghosts of a desperate solo road trip she made when she was twenty-one. A towering cumulus cloud in Illinois brings back a breathtaking free fall into a similar cloud in "My Time as a Bird." An encounter with a great blue heron summons a compelling account of her mother's last afternoon in the world. "Bears in the Woods" describes a run-in with two Deliverance-type men in West Virginia, which brings back the murder of a dear friend in the woods of Connecticut.

By the end of the journey, the ghosts of the past, like the author herself, have become part of a more fluid, more spiritual reality -- wild and spare and elegant and timeless -- one that is always out there, "quickening on the far side of reality."

A unique mix of memoir and nature writing, The Black Swan is a charming story of a woman's odyssey.

The 50 Year Dash

Bob Greene

The 50 Year Dash Bob Greene List Price: $21.95
By: Doubleday
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Total reviews: 9 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

Editorial Review:

A man turning 50 was asked if he really felt middle-aged.  "I don't feel middle-aged," he replied.  "I feel like a teenager who's been in a fight."

That funny, chin-up, defiant declaration captures Bob Greene's own feelings about life at the big five-oh, and sets the tone for this wonderful new book of reflections on family, career, money, sex, mortality, friendship, regrets, memories, doctors, rivals, yearnings, sleep, lust, embarrassments, and horizons.  The 50-Year Dash touches on everything that's part of life at fifty: looking at aches and pains as a growth industry, and seeing the constant onslaught of new pain relievers as a modern version of the British invasion of rock groups in the 1960s; finding that the world is no longer sufficiently quiet, and that you're the one yelling "Turn that down!"; realizing you're older than James Bond ever was; hearing yourself say, "The fruit plate looks good," and meaning it; understanding that the one thing which seems to be going away from you the fastest is that first-time feeling--first job, first house, first kiss--and knowing that the best thing you can do for yourself is try to keep finding that feeling again and again.

Between now and the year 2014, 77 million American men and women will turn 50, entering a strange land that once seemed so far away.  The 50-Year Dash is a whimsical, wise, funny, bittersweet, evocative, nostalgic book to take along on the journey.

Bob Greene's national bestsellers include Be True to Your School; Hang Time: Days and Dreams with Michael Jordan; Good Morning, Merry Sunshine; and, with his sister, D.G. Fulford, To Our Children's Children: Preserving Family Histories for Generations to Come.  Greene is a syndicated columnist for the Chicago Tribune; his column appears in more than two hundred newspapers in the United States, Canada, and Japan.  For nine years his "American Beat" was the lead column in Esquire magazine; and as a broadcast journalist he has served as contributing correspondent for ABC News Nightline.  The 50-Year Dash is his sixteenth book.  His next--Chevrolet Summers, Dairy Queen Nights--will be published in the fall of 1997.

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