Humor Books - Page 10

The Downhill Lie: A Hacker's Return to a Ruinous Sport

Carl Hiaasen

Amazon Price: $14.96 List Price: $22.00 Usually ships in 24 hours By: Knopf Amazon Marketplace: 79 new & used starting at $6.95

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 47 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

Ever wonder how to retrieve a sunken golf cart from a snake-infested lake? Or which club in your bag is best suited for combat against a horde of rats? If these and other sporting questions are gnawing at you, The Downhill Lie, Carl Hiaasen’s hilarious confessional about returning to the fairways after a thirty-two-year absence, is definitely the book for you.

Originally drawn to the game by his father, Carl wisely quit golfing in 1973, when “Richard Nixon was hunkered down like a meth-crazed badger in the White House, Hank Aaron was one dinger shy of Babe Ruth’s all-time home run record, and The Who had just released Quadrophenia.” But some ambitions refuse to die, and as the years—and memories of shanked 7-irons—faded, it dawned on Carl that there might be one thing in life he could do better in middle age than he could as a youth. So gradually he ventured back to the dreaded driving range, this time as the father of a five-year-old son—and also as a grandfather.

“What possesses a man to return in midlife to a game at which he’d never excelled in his prime, and which in fact had dealt him mostly failure, angst and exasperation? Here’s why I did it: I’m one sick bastard.”

And thus we have Carl’s foray into a world of baffling titanium technology, high-priced golf gurus, bizarre infomercial gimmicks and the mind-bending phenomenon of Tiger Woods; a maddening universe of hooks and slices where Carl ultimately—and foolishly—agrees to compete in a country-club tournament against players who can actually hit the ball. “That’s the secret of the sport’s infernal seduction,” he writes. “It surrenders just enough good shots to let you talk yourself out of quitting.”

Hiaasen’s chronicle of his shaky return to this bedeviling pastime and the ensuing demolition of his self-esteem—culminating with the savage 45-hole tournament—will have you rolling with laughter. Yet the bittersweet memories of playing with his own father and the glow he feels when watching his own young son belt the ball down the fairway will also touch your heart. Forget Tiger, Phil and Ernie. If you want to understand the true lure of golf, turn to Carl Hiaasen, who has written an extraordinary book for the ordinary hacker.

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart Presents America (The Book) Teacher's Edition: A Citizen's Guide to Democracy Inaction

Jon Stewart, The Writers of The Daily Show

Amazon Price: $10.87 List Price: $15.99 Usually ships in 24 hours By: Grand Central Publishing Amazon Marketplace: 98 new & used starting at $4.32

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 628 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

Editorial Review:

Book Description For everyone who was too cheap to buy the hardcover, the blockbuster, award-winning No. 1 New York Times bestseller is now in trade paperback--with a new introduction, fully updated, and with equally unsettling nude photos of the newest Supreme Court justices, and a text corrected by the most reputable college professor we could find/afford.Including:• Historical inaccuracies, gross distortions, complete fabrications-corrected by real-life bearded college professor• A new introduction by the authors• Supreme Court Justices John Roberts and Samuel Alito--nude!• Totally updated ISBN number!• American-style democracy is the world's most beloved form of government, which explains why so many other nations are eager for us to impose it on them. But what is American democracy? Amazon.com ExclusivesFeaturing a foreword by Thomas Jefferson, a Dress the Supreme Court layout, and, oddly enough, a profile of George "The Iceman" Gervin, America (The Book): A Citizen's Guide to Democracy Inaction, from Jon Stewart and the writers of the Emmy Award-winning The Daily Show, is by far one the most irreverent and wittiest (and may we add smartest) political book you're likely to encounter. Amazon.com spoke with Jon Stewart a few days before the 2004 publication of America (The Book) and they discussed bald eagles, magical talking cats, Thor Heyerdahl, and much more • Read the Amazon.com Interview with Jon Stewart • Listen to the Amazon.com Interview with Jon Stewart • Watch a "Vintage" Amazon.com Exclusive Video from Jon Stewart More from Jon Stewart Naked Pictures of Famous People America (The Book) [Audio CD] The Daily Show with Jon Stewart: Indecision 2004 [DVD]

Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are? (Classic Seuss)

Dr. Seuss

List Price: $13.00 By: Random House Books for Young Readers Amazon Marketplace: 4 new & used starting at $44.87

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 22 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky YouAre? 5 out of 5 stars.
0 of 0 people found this review helpful.

I purchased this book for my daughter (a 33 year old 1st grade teacher) for her birthday. It was her favorite book as a child. She read it to her classroom and the kids loved it. No one in her class had heard of this book before. Even the school librarian had not heard of it. It is a great book and of course the illustrations were wonderful. I think the best part of the book is the true meaning of the book that no matter how bad you think you have it or how bad things are, there's always someone worse off than you are. It teaches positive thinking for all ages. My grandsons loved the book too so I know it will end up as worn out as the original book I purchased 30 years ago.

Great book for remembering how lucky we all are!!! 5 out of 5 stars.
0 of 0 people found this review helpful.

I love this Dr. Seuss book. It is too easy these days to focus on the negative things in life. I bought this book for my 10 year old son and 12 year old daughter to remind them, in a humorous way, that even though everything in life may not be exactly the way they want it to be, they still have a pretty terrific life.

Editorial Review:

Illus. in full color. A special paperback edition of the book accompanies the cassette, which features spirited original music, humorous sound effects, and John Cleese's hilarious narration. Cassette running time: approx. 20 min.  

I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like: A Comprehensive Compilation of History's Greatest Analogies, Metaphors, and Similes

Mardy Grothe

Amazon Price: $10.17 List Price: $14.95 Usually ships in 24 hours By: Collins Amazon Marketplace: 63 new & used starting at $7.58

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 20 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

The murals in restaurants are on a par with the food in museums.

America is an enormous frosted cupcake in the middle of millions of starving people.

Critics are like pigs at the pastry cart.

Describing something by relating it to another thing is the essence of metaphorical thought. It is one of the oldest activities of humankind—and one of the most impressive when done skillfully. Throughout history, many masters of metaphor have crafted observations that are so spectacular they have taken up a permanent residence in our minds.

In I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like, quotation maven Dr. Mardy Grothe fixes his attention on the three superstars of figurative language—analogies, metaphors, and similes. The result is an extraordinary compilation of nearly 2,000 feats of association that will entertain, educate, and occasionally inspire quotation lovers everywhere.

In this intellectual smorgasbord, the author of Oxymoronica and Viva la Repartee explains figurative language in a refreshingly down-to-earth way before taking readers on a tour of history's greatest word pictures. In chapters on wit, love, sex, stage and screen, insults, politics, sports, and more, you will find quotations from Aristotle and Maya Angelou to George Washington and Oprah Winfrey.

Animals Should Definitely Not Act Like People

Judi Barrett

List Price: $5.99 By: Aladdin Amazon Marketplace: 13 new & used starting at $0.25

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 16 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

short and funny 5 out of 5 stars.
0 of 0 people found this review helpful.

This book is very short and the pictures just make me and ny son laugh. Well done

Hilarious easy reader 5 out of 5 stars.
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We use this book in our kindergarten class. The students just laugh and laugh over the pictures of animals wearing clothes.

Great Read 5 out of 5 stars.
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I work in a Nursery and I bought this book to read to the children. They loved it! They thought it was hilarious.

Cute title 3 out of 5 stars.
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Cute title but the book was a little too old for my two year old grandaughter. Not sure she got the concept of animals wearing or not wearing clothes.

Very nice book for any child 4 out of 5 stars.
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I really liked this book and bought it for my newphew, who is 4. I thought it was silly and somewhat unlike other books I had read. There are simple words or phrases that he can possibly learn to read. There are cute drawings in the book. It gets the imagination flowing.

Editorial Review:

Animals should definitely not act like people.

...because it would be foolish for a fish, so silly for a sheep, and preposterous for a panda -- as Ron Barrett's wonderfully detailed drawings show.

This book will show children a new way of looking at animals and people, even as they laugh.

I Am America (And So Can You!) 2009 Desk Calendar

Stephen Colbert

Amazon Price: $10.39 List Price: $12.99 Usually ships in 24 hours By: Humor - Model: BAKER-BT9780446519410 Amazon Marketplace: 20 new & used starting at $7.55

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Features:

• Size: 4 x 6
• Humor

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Editorial Review:

Stephen Colbert's I am America ( And So Can You!) is now a 365 days calendar- because eveyone needs a daily dose of truth.

Bad Cat Page-A-Day Calendar 2009 (Original Page a Day Calendars)

Workman Publishing Company

Amazon Price: $9.59 List Price: $11.99 Usually ships in 24 hours By: 2009 Calendars - Model: 14950 Amazon Marketplace: 37 new & used starting at $8.16

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 4 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

It's a cat calendar......... 5 out of 5 stars.
2 of 2 people found this review helpful.

After careful checking yes, this has ALL the dates of the year -- what more do you expect from a calendar?? Seriously, if you love cats you'll get multiple laughs from this calendar -- every day has it's own Bad Cat and any cat owner (or, keeper, since no one OWNS a cat!) will recognize some of these cats --- and their attitudes. If you love cats, and have a desk calendar, this is certainly one to consider. And if you KNOW someone who fits that description, it's a fun inexpensive Christmas present for them!

Editorial Review:

Bad Cat is paws-down the most offensive cat calendar ever—and the funniest, packed with day after day of inexcusable feline behavior. Here are hundreds of kitties gone crazy: the lethargic and the clumsy, the goofy, the indifferent, the cross-eyed, and the plain ol' mean. Inspired by the #1 New York Times bestselling book this calendar includes Bad Cats in Show Business, Feline Faux Paws, Bad Cat Parole Violations, and Bad Cat Fortune Cookies (Fortune: You will feed me or die).

Animal Farm: Centennial Edition

George Orwell

Amazon Price: $11.20 List Price: $14.00 Usually ships in 24 hours By: Plume Amazon Marketplace: 61 new & used starting at $3.40

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 1156 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

Animal Farm is instructive for our presidential election. 5 out of 5 stars.
3 of 3 people found this review helpful.

2008 is the ideal time to apply the principles that we have learned from Animal Farm and apply them to November's 2008 Presidential election. Just as Napolean, the pig, instigated a rebellion against the owner of the farm (Jones) by talking about how great things will be once the animals ruled the farm, today we are told by the Obama Democrats that once Bush and the Republicans are thrown off the farm (Washington), that all will be well, that things will look wonderful, and that none of us will ever be hungry again. In Animal Farm, though, the animals were far worse off after Mr. Jones was kicked off the farm. Like Obama, Napolean also did not have any experience in running a farm, but this did not stop him from stating that he would be more competent and able to handle the farm. Further, once Napolean took charge of the farm, the interests of the other animals started to decline more and more. He started to remove any sense of democratic principles by eliminating the need for public comment and strongly took action against any potential dissent. This is exactly where the Obama Democrats want to take our country--first, by stating that they (and he alone) can manage the country -- even though there is no experience to suggest that he ought to, and secondly, by eliminating any form of dissent by destroying talk radio and also by heavily regulating and taxing the internet in order to suppress the one free and open medium that is available to counter their message. The lesson of Animal Farm is clear: those who claim to provide us with utopia on earth often will create hell instead through dictatorship, centralization of authority, and a desire to obtain power for power's sake. If we learn the lessons of Animal Farm, our nation will be far better off.

Editorial Review:

As ferociously fresh as it was more than a half century ago, this remarkable allegory of a downtrodden society of overworked, mistreated animals, and their quest to create a paradise of progress, justice, and equality is one of the most scathing satires ever published. As we witness the rise and bloody fall of the revolutionary animals, we begin to recognize the seeds of totalitarianism in the most idealistic organization; and in our most charismatic leaders, the souls of our cruelest oppressors.

With a new forward by Gore Vidal.