Essays Books - Page 12

Never Sniff A Gift Fish

Patrick F. McManus

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 10 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

so good you can't describe it 5 out of 5 stars.
6 of 6 people found this review helpful.

i first theses books when i was ten years old and i haven't stopped yet.. we only have four books but i intend to get more of the books.. they are funny.. i like the one where he goes hunting on his bicycle and gets the deer stuck on the pedals.

Addicting!!!! 4 out of 5 stars.
5 of 5 people found this review helpful.

Never Look a Gift Fish was my introduction to the wonderful world of Patrick F. McManus. Each story had me remembering similar incidents in my life, only mine were not near as entertaining.

While listening to these tapes during a cross-state drive to a football game, I caught myself driving slower as I approached my destination because I did not want to have to wait until the return trip to continue listening.

It is ironic that many of his stories are based on fishing because I, for one, am HOOKED!!

The Great Outdoorsman's Guide To Success 5 out of 5 stars.
5 of 5 people found this review helpful.

NEVER SNIFF A GIFT FISH
By: Patrick F. McManus

Have you ever heard of a great outdoorsman? You know, the one whose fly-casting technique can be compared to an old lady fighting off a bee with a broom handle. Or maybe the one whose attempts to pitch the family tent terrorized entire campgrounds. Well, for those of you who haven't heard of him, this book, will give you a little insight into the life of the great outdoorsman. Never Sniff A Gift Fish, is a great source for those useful camping phrases. Here are some of them.

Corn Flakes: A common camp food. Often eaten dry with salt and pepper since no one thought to bring milk.

Camping manuals: Books filled with ingenious camping tips which are forgotten the instant the camper sets foot in the field. "I read about a way to cook a chicken with a camera lens and a wire clothes hanger, but I can't remember how," he says. "Better just fry it."

Downwind: Whichever side of the campfire you happen to be on.
And who could forget "When hell freezes over": An expression used by wives and mothers to indicate the next time you'll get them to go on another camping trip.

This book is a hilarious combination of philosophy and fishing, all rolled into one. I loved the book, and I would definitely recommend this book to any outdoorsman, great or not, that has a sense of humor and a sense of what the author is going through.

Editorial Review:

More humerous observations and insights into the agonies and ecstacies of hunting, fishing, and camping by the author of They Shoot Canoes, Don't They?and other celebrations of life in the wild.

I'd Rather Do Chemo Than Clean Out the Garage:: Choosing Laughter over Tears

Fran Di Giacomo

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 19 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Good Book 5 out of 5 stars.
0 of 0 people found this review helpful.

This is a good and funny book. My mom started chemo recently and I was reading this book before I gave it to her actually and these in it seems to relate well to her situation and gives you a new view on looking at chemo. I recommend this book.

Laughter is good!!! 5 out of 5 stars.
0 of 0 people found this review helpful.

Very lighthearted and enjoyable to pick up anytime. I've carried it to my doctor's appointments which usually last several hours and am always glad I brought it!!! Well done!!

Didn't like this book either.. 2 out of 5 stars.
0 of 0 people found this review helpful.

Didn't like this book either.. It wasn't funny and anyone going through chemo only wish they could even feel like cleaning out the garage. My 16 year old is going through 3 horrible toxic chemos and she said she would Definitely rather clean out the garage rather than having to go through the chemo... it wasn't something entertaining enough to keep me reading, it was quite boring. If you want to laugh.. get Jeff Dunham's DVD, the newer one, it is sooo funny!! Search for him on YouTube..

Humerous Look at a Serious Topic 5 out of 5 stars.
0 of 0 people found this review helpful.

I recently was diagnosed with cancer and have been very down. This book is funny and gives you a humerous way to look at the seriousness of cancer. Everytime I get stuck with an IV pole I think about this book and chuckle. When my hair fell out I thought of all the funny things the author had to say about her experience and I felt so much better. This is a fantastic book.

Into the Twilight, Endlessly Grousing

Patrick F. McManus

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 12 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

McManus is Mc FUN is 5 out of 5 stars.
3 of 4 people found this review helpful.

As a long time reader of Mr. McManus, my first run-in with this hilarious author was back in the days when I'd steal my dad's Outdoor Life and Field and Stream magazines to sneak away and pour over Mr. McManus' columns. I'm all grown up now, and don't have to steal my dad's magazines. I'm much sneakier now. I buy the books on the pretext that I'm getting them for my husband, then I read them instead. Mr. McManus, you are a delight!! Please write more!

Editorial Review:

Patrick McManus believes that life's eternal truths exist solely for the purpose of being overturned and proved incorrect. In McManus's world, nothing is what it should be. All steaks should be chicken-fried, strong coffee is drunk by the light of a campfire, and fishing trips consist of men acting like boys and boys behaving like the small animals we've always assumed they were.

Into the Twilight, Endlessly Grousing is a hilarious collection from one of the greatest contemporary humorists: Dave Barry or Garrison Keillor with a twist of Mark Twain. In these adventures, McManus offers wry observations about small-town life and curmudgeonly insists on bigger and bigger fish stories.

Hello Junk Mail!

Ted L. Nancy

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Editorial Review:

Who is Ted L. Nancy? Is it Jerry Seinfeld as many believe? Or is Ted L. Nancy someone else? Mr. Nancy’s hilarious, notorious Letters from a Nut series documented his correspondence with celebrities and companies, who took his outlandish ideas and suggestions at face value. In Hello Junk Mail!, Nancy tackles one of the most pernicious evils of the modern age: the junk mailer. Now writing with the Kabobbys of Glendale, a newly arrived foreign family and their relatives, Ted and his new neighbors answer scores of junk letters with riotous results. Responding to a solicitation from a pest control company, Hamooli Kabobby requests that they eliminate his freeloading cousin, then tells the pest control company about his family problems of body odors and stinky backyards. Geela Kabobby writes the distributors of free instant breakfast samples to ask if they cure eye infections. Grandfather Bahir Kabobby writes to a mortgage company: "Yes, I want financial freedom and healthier toes." Laid out as copies of the actual correspondence, the letters are as authentic as they are ridiculous — and all are wildly entertaining. So who is Ted? Jerry Seinfeld or The Kabobbys of Glendale?

Hey Ranger!: True Tales of Humor & Misadventure from America's National Parks

Jim Burnett

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 20 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Only mildly amusing 3 out of 5 stars.
8 of 8 people found this review helpful.

In this book, Jim Burnett collects amusing stories about visitors in the national parks. These people are normally called "tourons," though Burnett doesn't use the term here. Some of the stories come from his career as a park ranger, while other stories come from other rangers who told them to Burnett. He also includes some background on each park where he was stationed during his career (Lake Mead National Recreation Area, Buffalo National River, Glacier National Park, Colonial National Historical Park, and Lincoln Boyhood National Memorial). An appendix provides advice on how not to get hurt being stupid in the national parks.

The book suffers in comparison with other memoir-writers, especially my current favorite, game warden Terry Grosz. Most of Burnett's stories are only mildly amusing, though there are a few good ones. More problematic is the way he tells them - - he gets to the punchline much too fast, so that these stories only last a couple of pages. The second-hand stories are even shorter, more like one-liner jokes. Grosz, in contrast, can spin a tale out much more effectively.

All in all, the book is pleasant enough, and I purchased it at very deep discount, so it's not really disappointing. But there are better options out there.

Editorial Review:

In his thirty years with the National Park Service, Jim Burnett has seen it all: boat ramp mishaps that have sent cars into the water; skunks in the outhouse and bears at the dumpster; visitors looking for the bridge over the Grand Canyon.

Mortified: Real Words. Real People. Real Pathetic.

David Nadelberg

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 28 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

Share the shame.

In the days before blogs, teenagers recorded their lives with a pen in top-secret notebooks, usually emblazoned with an earnest, underlined plea to parents to keep away. Since 2002, David Nadelberg has tapped that vast wellspring of adolescent anguish in the stage show Mortified, in which grown men and women confront their past with firsthand tales of their first kiss, first puff, worst prom, fights with mom, life at bible camp, worst hand job, best mall job, and reasons they deserved to marry Simon LeBon.

Following the same formula that has made the live show a beloved cult hit, Mortified the book takes real childhood journals and documents and edits the entries into captivating, comedic, and cathartic stories, introduced by their now older (and allegedly wiser) authors. From letters begging rescue from a hellish summer camp to catty locker notes about stuck-up classmates to obsessive love that borders on stalking, Mortified gives voice to the real -- and really pathetic -- hopes, fears, desires, and creative urgings that have united adolescents for generations.

The Darwin Awards: The Descent of Man

Wendy Northcutt

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 5 Average rating: 3.0 of 5

great book, but mini 4 out of 5 stars.
1 of 2 people found this review helpful.

I purchased this book thinking it would be a regular, full-sized book. It is in fact a very small book. It will fit in the palm of my hand. It's contents however isn't lacking at all despite the size. I would prefer a regular size book, but I'll take it as I can get it.

NOT A BOOK - IT'S TINY! 2 out of 5 stars.
1 of 2 people found this review helpful.

My son loves the Darwin Awards books, so I ordered this one for his birthday. I was shocked when it arrived because it's only 2.25"x3.25" - not exactly the kind of thing you wrap up for a birthday present. I'm sending it back and getting him a real book!

Editorial Review:

In this miniature volume taken from the best-selling Darwin Awards series, men meet their inner idiots as they remove themselves from the gene pool. Driven by testosterone, they engage in unnatural encounters with vegetables, select bizarre rendezvous locations, and use downright dangerous erotic aids, thereby confirming the common belief that men don't always think with their brains. Including full-color illustrations and nine never-before-published stories, this miniature collection makes a wonderful addition to the Darwin Awards library.

Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys

Dave Barry

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 44 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

Dave Dave, he's the man, if he can't make you laugh, nobody can 5 out of 5 stars.
2 of 2 people found this review helpful.

What I love about Dave is he's a regular guy....and yet, he's so darn funny! Here he is writing about what he knows best - guys. I laughed so hard that tears were rolling down my face........and I wasn't even past the introduction! Seriously though, this book should be required reading for any girl planning to get married or just moving in with a guy. It might save them some grief later on. Heck - it could even save a marriage or two or thirteen! Dave so hilariously shares with us all the mysteries of being a guy - from scratching (still chuckling about that chapter) to urinal etiquette, fear of committment to special medical conditions such as memory lapses. He truly says it like it is and oh, it's said so well. There's only one other humor writer who has made me laugh so hard I peed my pants (thanks a lot, Jarod Kintz) but Dave rates right up there for Guy Most Likely to Make you Pee.

Editorial Review:

For thousands of years, women have asked themselves: What is the deal with guys, anyway? What are they thinking? The answer, of course, is: virtually nothing. But that has not stopped Dave Barry from writing an entire book about them, dealing frankly and semi-thoroughly with such important guy issues as:

- Scratching
- Why the average guy can remember who won the 1960 World Series but
   not necessarily the names of all his children
- Why guys cannot simultaneously think and look at breasts
- Secret guy orgasm-delaying techniques, including the Margaret Thatcher
   Method
- Why guys prefer to believe that there is no such thing as a "prostate"

The Insanity Defense: The Complete Prose

Woody Allen

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 8 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

Comprising the classic bestsellers Getting Even, Without Feathers, and Side Effects, this definitive collection of comic writings is from a man who needs no Introduction. Really–this book has no Introduction.

The Insanity Defense reveals many sides of Woody Allen as he holds forth on the most human of urges (“Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only for food: frequently there must be a beverage”); reflects on death (“I don’t believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear”); and notes the effect on history wrought by trick chewing gum, the dribble glass, and other novelties. There is also an inspiring story of the futile race to beat Dr. Heimlich to the punch: “The food went down the wrong pipe, and choking occurred. Grasping the mouse firmly by the tail, I snapped it like a small whip, and the morsel of cheese came loose. If we can transfer the procedure to humans, we may have something. Too early to tell.”

All Woody Allen fans will cherish this uproarious treasury–and those who don’t enjoy The Insanity Defense are just plain crazy.

“If you don’t care if you break into helpless whoops of laughter on buses, trains, or wherever you happen to be reading it.”
–Chicago Tribune, on Without Feathers

“Brilliant flights of fancy whose comic detail and inspired silliness are at once dramatic and controlled.”
–The New York Times, on Side Effects

Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Plunges into Hollywood (Bathroom Readers)

Bathroom Readers' Hysterical Society

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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 8 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Strange title, but a fun book. 5 out of 5 stars.
2 of 2 people found this review helpful.

This was a gift from a media friend of ours. She knows I stay in the car and read when my wife shops. So this is more a car book than a bathroom book. It is fun and there are so many sections in so many categories and covers most of the great stars. The only complaint I would make is that there are some great ones only given a sentence or not mentioned at all. A sequel to this book is needed. We need more on Susan Hayward than a line. And we do need material on other favorites like Rhonda Fleming, Deanna Lund and Joyce Meadows. Very much appreciated was information on the old great horror films, science fiction, Westerns and action/adventure.

Editorial Review:

Uncle John’s team of stellar researchers has dug deep to probe the mysteries, mayhem, and majesty of the movies and their makers. This witty tome for the throne covers such topics as landmarks (just how tall is the Hollywood sign?); mind-boggling special effects; Hollywood murder mysteries, including the strange death of Jean Harlow’s husband; “Where Are They Now?”, a guide to the final resting places of the stars; and lists of the best and worst flicks in several categories, including westerns, sci fi, action, drama, biopics, comedies, and many more. Of course, no book on Hollywood is complete without plenty of diva-licious dish: “Joan Crawford vs. X” details her bitter, bizarre rivalries with Bette Davis and Norma Shearer. Jam-packed with quotes, historical tidbits, puzzles, quizzes, and the effluvia of Hollywood, Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Plunges into Hollywood is sure to keep film buffs enthralled while enthroned.