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Mating in Captivity

Esther Perel

Mating in Captivity Esther Perel By: Hodder & Stoughton Ltd
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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 36 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

Excellent...except for one part 3 out of 5 stars.
3 of 3 people found this review helpful.

Because the author's ideas are provocative, this won't be an easy read. It wasn't for me, but it was highly enlightening as well. The author challenged all my beliefs about love and how relationships really work and I rather liked being challenged. She made me think in ways I had never before.

For example, her discussion on how desire needs distance, but intimacy needs closeness and how these two conflict with each other in long-term relationships is dead on! But the author believes, and I agree, that it's possible to achieve both even if it seems impossible. She explains how this is possible without cornering you into believing only one method is the right way. There is no right way. Instead she shows how couples have managed to achieve this in their own way and discusses the pros and cons of each.

I also appreciated her discussion on how sexual fantasies differ from everyday fantasies. If you fantasize about the perfect job or the perfect mate, it's because you want these things to happen in reality. However, if you have a sexual fantasy about being raped, it doesn't mean that you want this to happen in reality. There's an element to your fantasy that is your true desire and in your sexual fantasies, you are in complete control about how this plays out.
I don't want to give away all her secrets because that would be like giving away the ending to a really good movie.

So, if I'm so in love with this book, why would I only give it 3 out of 5 stars? It's because there's a part in the book where the author agrees with a client that it's respectful to withhold telling the truth about an affair. I've heard this argument before and I strongly disagree. I think it's disrespectful to decide for someone else (who's not your child) what they can and cannot handle. Withholding the truth is not about respect, it's about fear. If you told the truth, that person could leave you or retaliate in another way. By withholding the truth from them, you strip them of their choices in order to gain an unfair advantage over them. Lying to someone in order to keep them bound to you is not only selfish and controlling, it's also manipulative. It's just manipulation reframed in a positive way. And a surprising argument coming from an author who earlier was arguing against possessiveness. So, while I thoroughly enjoyed the rest of this book, this part left me cold.

Otherwise, I highly recommend this provocative, yet enlightening book.

The Sensuous Couple's (Flip Over) Guide to Seismic Oral Sex

D. Claire Hutchins, Avery Sinclair

The Sensuous Couple's (Flip Over) Guide to Seismic Oral Sex D. Claire Hutchins, Avery Sinclair Amazon Price: $18.95
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By: JPS Publishing Company
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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 11 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

Editorial Review:

TWO BOOKS IN ONE! Fully illustrated!

Was that an earthquake or did it really feel that good? There is nothing as divine as receiving splendidly performed oral sex. For the man who wants to drive his woman wild with his cunnilingus technique, read Book I, Cunnilingus by D. Claire Hutchins. For the woman who wants to give her man the best fellatio ever, flip the guide over and read Book II, Fellatio by Avery Sinclair. The Sensuous Couple's Guide provides you with the techniques, confidence and skills you need to rock your partner's world.
BUT, not only will you become a master in the art of oral sex, you will learn how to have fun and enjoy bestowing this remarkable gift on the one you treasure. This one volume is all any couple will ever need in their library.

FLIP OVER - EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT CUNNILINGUS
Inside you ll learn:
Step by step instructions for going down on a woman.
Female anatomy of arousal and what stimulates her most.
How to perform (and receive) safe oral sex.
How to introduce oral sex into a new or an established relationship.
How to handle the disappearing orgasm.
Advanced G-spot, anal and clitoral stimulation for a dynamic orgasmic combination.
Proper oral sex etiquette (yes, there is one).
How to deal with the emotional needs of women.

FLIP OVER - EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT FELLATIO
The Sensuous Couple's Guide shows you how to WOW him and enjoy yourself in the process. Inside you ll discover:
The anatomy of male sexual arousal - how it works and why.
Effective communication with your partner (his and hers).
Simple to - advanced techniques.
How to perform (and receive) safe oral sex.
How to introduce oral sex into a new or an established relationship.
How to handle premature, or the lack of, ejaculation, and what to do once it happens.
Advanced sweet-spot, anal and prostate stimulation for dynamic orgasmic combinations.
How to deal with his or her issues and feel comfortable with oral sex.

Join together for an exciting adventure in oral sex - beyond pleasure to ultimate bliss!!An amazing TWO BOOKS IN ONE!

How to Make Love Like a Porn Star: A Cautionary Tale

Jenna Jameson, Neil Strauss, Neil Strauss

How to Make Love Like a Porn Star: A Cautionary Tale Jenna Jameson, Neil Strauss, Neil Strauss Amazon Price: $21.45
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By: HarperEntertainment
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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 240 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

When the stewardess brought me off the plane in a wheelchair, I lowered my head. I was too scared to even look at my father. I didn't want to see the disappointment and horror on his face. All that hate I had accumulated for him over the years, all the resentment against him for not understanding what I was going through, just released with the tears.

"So, where are your parents?" the stewardess asked me after a few minutes. "I can't wait here with you much longer."

I looked up and wiped my eyes. My father was standing ten feet away. He didn't even recognize me.

In the underbelly of Las Vegas, a cesspool of warring biker gangs and seedy strip clubs transformed the gawky, brace-faced Jenna Massoli into the bombshell Jenna Jameson. Today, Jenna Jameson is the biggest star in the history of adult movies, consistently ranked as one of the most beautiful women alive. But behind the glamour and the meteoric rise to fame was a path paved with tragedy and heartbreak. As a teenager drawn into a chaotic world ruled by rape, abuse, and murder, Jenna plunged into a downward spiral of addiction, even as she became one of the most photographed women in adult magazines.

Determined to overcome this past, Jenna rebounded in the adult-film business, where she encountered sadistic directors, experienced lovers of both sexes, amorous celebrities (from Howard Stern to Marilyn Manson to Tommy Lee), bitter rival starlets, and finally, glory, as she went on to become the biggest porn star the world has ever seen. But her struggle for happiness did not end when the accolades began. For years she wrestled with her resentment at her estranged father, the loneliness of growing up from the age of two without a mother, and her enduring childhood desire to find a man who could give her the security and love she never had.

Her unforgettable memoir is many things at once: a shocking sexual history, an insider's guide to the secret workings of the billion-dollar adult-film industry, and a gripping thriller that probes deep into Jenna's dark past. An unparalleled exploration of sexual freedom, How to Make Love Like a Porn Star ventures far beyond the flesh, into the heart-shredding tragedies and adrenaline-pumping triumphs of a woman who has already lived a hundred lifetimes. Always witty and humorous even as she faces the demons of her past, Jenna offers hilarious anecdotes about one of the most controversial businesses in history, and shares outrageous advice, including her ten commandments of dating and sex, how to become a "suitcase pimp," and how to make it in the business as a female (or a male).

Add to this never-before-seen photographs from Jenna's private collection and others taken exclusively for this book, and the result is certain to be one of the most talked-about books of the year.

Mars and Venus on a Date: 5 Steps to Success in Love and Romance

John Gray

Mars and Venus on a Date: 5 Steps to Success in Love and Romance John Gray List Price: $16.50
By: Vermilion
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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 117 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Best dating book I've ever read 5 out of 5 stars.
2 of 2 people found this review helpful.

I hated the book, Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus........... However, this book really seemed right on. Great insight for women on how men think, how men date, when and when not to call and the especially important, "Stage Two: Uncertainty period". Explains why men wait to get involved, etc. If you are baffled about men like I was, this book is worth it's weight in gold.

Great Book - It completely changed my outlook on dating 5 out of 5 stars.
1 of 1 people found this review helpful.

This book changed the way I relate to men. The techniques really work and I wish I would've read this book 20 years ago. I realized I can be feminine and receive love. I can allow a man to help me and not do everything myself. Since reading the book I've really enjoyed my new dating life and love being more feminine and having the ability to attract men. It's a lot more fun. I look forward to reading and learning more from this author.

Editorial Review:

Offering practical advice to single people looking for a relationship, this guide takes the reader through five stages of dating: attraction, ambivalence, commitment, true intimacy and proposal/marriage. It includes advice on how to find a soulmate and how to create a committed relationship.

The Layguide: How to Seduce Women More Beautiful Than You Ever Dreamed Possible No Matter What You Look Like or How Much You Make

Tony Clink

The Layguide: How to Seduce Women More Beautiful Than You Ever Dreamed Possible No Matter What You Look Like or How Much You Make Tony Clink Amazon Price: $10.36
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By: Citadel
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Subjects -> Health, Mind & Body -> Psychology & Counseling -> Applied Psychology
Subjects -> Health, Mind & Body -> Psychology & Counseling -> Sexuality -> Psychology of Sexuality

Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 54 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Another Useful Self-Help Book 4 out of 5 stars.
8 of 10 people found this review helpful.

Since I've started reading the books from the Pick Up Community, I've seen a pattern in the basic ways to approach women: it's basically putting out all the good qualities associated with being a man.

Be confident. Attentive, charming, humorous. Dress better, work on conversational skills. Maintain respect but also hold the course for seduction.

All of this sounds simple enough but...I think I belong to a generation of broken homes where the battling, bewildered single parents didn't pass on ANYTHING useful to their children. Let popular music and TV guide you into the Tunnel of Love.

And what a disaster that's been. (It also didn't help that social engineering tried to instill that boys and girls are essentially the same. How damaging has that been?).

So these books, while initially provoking women to be offended that men will be taking advantage of them, end up being the education us guys never got.

THE LAYGUIDE has a title that would suggest this book is about only seducing and taking advantage of women. I didn't really get that. (If you're looking for a book that not only writes in terms of women as only sexual objects but where to go and how much to spend on endless sex objects, that would be THE PROFESSIONAL BACHELOR. Especially the second half).

THE LAYGUIDE is a smooth, well-written How To book on approaching women and moving into a relationship, whether for one night or the rest of your life.

The Whole Lesbian Sex Book: A Passionate Guide for All of Us

Felice Newman

The Whole Lesbian Sex Book: A Passionate Guide for All of Us Felice Newman Amazon Price: $16.47
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By: Cleis Press
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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 30 Average rating: 4.0 of 5

Great on the Basics 4 out of 5 stars.
3 of 3 people found this review helpful.

I read the 2005 German edition of the 1999 US book. It is on the basics of lesbian sexuality and beyond. There are other books recommended for saving the bored done-it-all inner city sexpert from lesbian bed death. But let's face it: Most of us aren't that lucky. It depends on what book you are seeking. It is not the book's fault that a few already know most of its content. This book is also for those who lack imagination, knowledge and/or experience in lesbian sexuality. Meaning, you don't have to be a lesbian to find this book informative. Which can't really be said about many heterosexual sex books vice versa. In fact, one or the other information, many gay men should be aware of, as the author isn't squeamish about anal sexuality.

You will find not only virtually everything from masturbation to sex parties, but also on safer sex. Especially this section is important for heterosexuals as well, as most of the latter hardly engage in it, when it comes to oral sex on females. Lately, I went into a classic straight sex shop to buy some dental dams and the sales person didn't even know what I was talking about, even though they offered them in some corner. This expensive, that I am glad that this book gives instructions to the public on how to make them yourself from cheaper and more readily available items. Again, recommendable information for everybody else in the anilingus version.

I find it noteworthy that this book takes the pressure off political correctness, when it comes to sexual fantasies. And yes, there's a difference, when this lesbian sexpert does it or some creepy sexual release magazine.

Be aware that the traditional hanky code has many variations. The meanings to the colors provided here are mostly shared. However, some may lead to misunderstandings. For example, white is decoded here as seeking/being a newbie. I know it rather as: "Leave me alone, today I am here just for the beer." It should also be noted that some colors look very similar in the usually softly lit places, where you find them.

You may be interested in specialized topics, like Female Ejaculation and the G-Spot: Not Your Mother's Orgasm Book! (Positively Sexual).

Editorial Review:

Witty and personal, The Whole Lesbian Sex Book is most comprehensive sex guide available for lesbians, offering information and support for all lesbian lifestyles. It speaks to lesbian and bisexual readers of diverse experiences—young and old, partnered and single, trans- and traditionally gendered, sexually experienced and naive. The Whole Lesbian Sex Book offers basic information, techniques, advice, support, and playful discourse on the subject of lesbian sex, including: where to find partners, G-spot stimulation, oral sex, vaginal fisting, dildos for fun and fashion, dynamics of butch/femme sex, anal sex, the pleasures of lube and latex, where to cop the best cybersex, and leather, piercings, tattoos, high heels, and other fetishes.

Passionista: The Empowered Woman's Guide to Pleasuring a Man

Ian Kerner

Passionista: The Empowered Woman's Guide to Pleasuring a Man Ian Kerner Amazon Price: $10.85
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By: Collins Living
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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 24 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

Editorial Review:

Transform Yourself from "Passion Victim" to Passionista!

In the smash hit She Comes First, Ian Kerner singlehandedly waged battle against male sexual "ill-cliteracy," and women everywhere benefited from his "viva la vulva" philosophy of female pleasure. Now, in Passionista, it's time to learn all about what turns men on—and makes them stay on. In this point-by-point, "blow-by-blow" guide, Kerner makes giving as much fun as receiving as he covers every angle of male sexuality, unlocks the secrets of satisfaction, and offers knowledgeable answers to the questions every woman wonders about. His advice is the closest you'll ever come to waking up in a guy's skin and knowing what truly makes him sexually tick.

Written in the same witty, insightful, and utterly readable voice that has made She Comes First and Be Honest—You're Not That Into Him Either so popular, Passionista is the empowered woman's guide to enjoying sex to the fullest—and ensuring that he does the same.

Testosterone for Life: Recharge Your Vitality, Sex Drive, Muscle Mass, and Overall Health

Abraham Morgentaler

Testosterone for Life: Recharge Your Vitality, Sex Drive, Muscle Mass, and Overall Health Abraham Morgentaler Amazon Price: $11.53
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By: McGraw-Hill
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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 4 Average rating: 5.0 of 5

Editorial Review:

"Dr. Morgentaler, an internationally recognized expert in sexual medicine and male hormones, shares his secrets for a healthy life."
--Irwin Goldstein, M.D., Director of Sexual Medicine, Alvarado Hospital, San Diego, and Editor-in-Chief, Journal of Sexual Medicine

.

"A highly valuable resource. Finally debunks many of the myths about testosterone's safety, which has been an impediment to its appropriate usage for far too long."
--David E. Greenberg, M.D., President, Canadian Society for the Study of the Aging Male

.

From a Harvard doctor and a leading expert on testosterone--the groundbreaking book that shows you how to raise your testosterone levels--and live your life to the fullest

. . .

Better sex. Increased vitality. More muscle. Improved health. Greater mental agility. These are just a few of the life-enhancing benefits that men with low levels of testosterone can experience when they increase their testosterone level. If you've noticed a decrease in your sex drive; experienced erectile dysfunction; or felt tired, depressed, and unmotivated, this authoritative, up-to-date guide from an expert at Harvard Medical School will help you determine if you have low testosterone--a surprisingly common but frequently undiagnosed condition among middle-aged men. Learn how to:

. .
  • Recognize the symptoms of low testosterone.
  • Diagnose the problem with simple tests.
  • Find the treatment that's right for you.
  • Explore options your doctor might not know about.
  • Reduce your risk of cardiovascular disease and obesity
. . .

The Sex-Starved Marriage: Boosting Your Marriage Libido: A Couple's Guide

Michele Weiner Davis

The Sex-Starved Marriage: Boosting Your Marriage Libido: A Couple's Guide Michele Weiner Davis Amazon Price: $11.20
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By: Simon & Schuster
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Customer Reviews:
Total reviews: 41 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

Editorial Review:

Bring the spark back into your bedroom and your relationship with gutsy and effective advice from bestselling author Michele Weiner Davis.


It is estimated that one of every three married couples struggles with problems associated with mismatched sexual desire. Do you? If you want to stop fighting about sex and revitalize your intimate connection with your spouse, then you need this book. In The Sex-Starved Marriage, bestselling author Michele Weiner Davis will help you understand why being complacent or bitter about ho-hum sex might cost you your relationship.

Full of moving firsthand accounts from couples who have struggled with the erosion of sexual desire and rebuilt their passionate connection, The Sex-Starved Marriage addresses every aspect of the sexual libido problem:

  • If you're the more highly sexed partner, you'll breathe a sigh of relief. At last someone understands your feelings about the void in your marriage. Discover why your pleas for touch have fallen upon deaf ears and why your approach to the lull in your sexual relationship could be a sexual turnoff. Most important, learn new ways to motivate your spouse to take your needs for more physical closeness to heart.
  • If you're the spouse with a lagging libido, you're far from alone. You'll learn about the physiological and psychological factors, including unresolved relationship issues, that may contribute to the chill in your bedroom and what you can do to melt the ice. And if you're a man, you'll be surprised to learn that staggering numbers of men, even men whose sexual machinery works just fine, "get headaches" too!

    The Sex-Starved Marriage will give you and your spouse the inspiration, encouragement, and answers you need.

  • Sin in the Second City: Madams, Ministers, Playboys, and the Battle for America's Soul

    Karen Abbott

    Sin in the Second City: Madams, Ministers, Playboys, and the Battle for America's Soul Karen Abbott Amazon Price: $25.54
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    By: Tantor Media
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    Subjects -> History -> Americas -> United States -> State & Local -> General

    Customer Reviews:
    Total reviews: 92 Average rating: 4.5 of 5

    CANNOT PUT IT DOWN 5 out of 5 stars.
    1 of 1 people found this review helpful.

    For those that love to read a book that grabs them and doesn't let go - Karen Abbott's Sin in the Second City is a MUST. Not only does the reader get an enjoyable history lesson- but along the way Karen shows us how so much of what we know and experience today - is not new at all.

    The portrait of the Everleigh sisters is simply fascinating, Chicago of the early 1900's was made for Abbott's prose - and the best part is - She's writing another book. People will read again - and Karen is one of the reasons why. Read this book. Its SUPER.

    I Love the Naughty Ladies 5 out of 5 stars.
    1 of 1 people found this review helpful.

    What I love about this book:

    - Terrific writing with vivid details about the lives of the Everleigh Sisters
    - A real feel for what it was like to live and work in the demimonde at the turn of the century
    - A sense of drama with the stories of the rivalries between brothels, the religious movement and the machinations of the political and legal systems.
    - Excellent insight into the greater social forces in regards to sexuality and women

    This is just a fascinating read - if you're like me, you won't put it down until the last page (and i am a notorious half-finisher, so that's quite a feat!) A fantastic choice for book clubs too!

    I *highly* recommend this - one chapter in and I guarantee that you will become a rabid fan like me.

    Editorial Review:

    Karen Abbotta (TM) s colorful, nuanced portrait of the iconic Everleigh sisters; their world-famous brothel, the Everleigh Club; and the perennial clash between our nation's hedonistic impulses and Puritanical roots culminates in a dramatic last stand between brothel keepers and crusading reformers. Sin in the Second City offers a vivid snapshot of America's journey from Victorian-era propriety to twentieth-century modernity.

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